Stevens: New perspective on life and rugby

Stevens last played at the headquarters of English rugby in a Test against New Zealand in November 2008, just a month before he failed a drugs test.

But the fact Stevens had to be reminded about his involvement against the All Blacks provides a clue as to the inner turmoil he was experiencing at the time.

Stevens was struggling to cope with the physical pressures of being a professional rugby player and he was going through some personal issues. Cocaine became his release.

Eventually he was caught, snared by a random test after a Heineken Cup game at Glasgow. A two-year ban followed, a period which has changed his life.

Stevens has twin daughters, Ava and Coco, with his fiancee India, whom he met 18 months ago. They have provided stability at home which has helped Stevens make a successful return to the sport he loves.

Saracens have not lost since Stevens joined them in January and they head into tomorrow's final against Leicester on the back of a 12-match unbeaten run.

"I have thought a lot about what has happened over the last couple of weeks, as we went through the semi-finals and now into the final, and how different it has been," said Stevens.

"I have a really strong base for myself at home. My fiancee and my kids have been such an anchor in my preparations and so important to me that everything now means so much more.

"That is quite foreign to think about because it meant so much to me back then - but it means more to me now.

"I will always regret what happened. When people say they have no regrets, I don't know how that is possible but every day I am looking forward to playing rugby and looking forward to being with new family, all the amazing things I have in my life.

"Playing at Twickenham was never a novelty. It was always a special experience and one this Saracens team will hopefully hold in their memory for a long time.

"It's hugely exciting. It is what everyone has been working on for so long. When I was banned all I was thinking about was getting back to playing rugby.

"I would always have hoped for this to happen. We were very ambitious as a squad and aiming to be in the final.

"It was a whirlwind to start with but it has been great. I have been happy with the progression I have made.

"I definitely think there is a lot of improvements to be made but I think I am on course to make them."

In the early days of his ban, Stevens set his sights on playing for England again at the 2011 Rugby World Cup and he is on course to do so.

Stevens, who will start at loose-head tomorrow but prefers tight-head, will link up with England Saxons for the Churchill Cup on Monday.

The immediate aim will be to break into Martin Johnson's World Cup training squad. His versatility could be invaluable for England.

"Someone who has been out of international rugby for more than two years has to prove themselves. That is my obstacle," said Stevens.

"I have been told that what is in the past is in the past. I have done the time and they are looking at me with a fresh sheet, if you can do that.

"There is every chance I can be in the World Cup squad if I perform to the standard I know is in me. That is what I have got to do.

"The ball is in my court. I have just got to perform well."

Saracens have made just one change from their semi-final victory over Gloucester, with Neil de Kock starting at scrum-half after winning a coin toss with rival Richard Wigglesworth.